Nov 20, 2025
When American couples have kids, they usually have to answer the difficult question of whether bringing in two incomes and paying for day care is the right choice for the family.
Imagine Dan, a stay-at-home dad whose wife brings in $85,000 a year. As the cost of raising a family grows, the couple have begun discussing whether it's time for Dan to return to work as an accountant. He would prefer to stay at home with the kids, but he's not sure he has a choice anymore. However, he wonders if paying for day care and returning to work would really be worthwhile.
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It's natural to assume a second income would be more than the cost of day care, but child care costs have been soaring in America. A new study from LendingTree says the cost of child care for an infant and a 4-year-old exceeds monthly rent in 85 metros out of the 100 analyzed (1). The study cited Child Care Aware of America data that shows the average cost of child care per child rose a whopping 35% from 2019 to 2024.
According to Care.com’s 2025 Cost of Care Report, the average parent spends 22% of their household income on child care (2). Last year, nearly 60% of parents spent at least $9,600 on child care.
“Spending almost $1,300 a month on child care is a massive burden for parents, but most families don’t have another choice,” said Matt Schulz, LendingTree's chief consumer finance analyst. “They can’t stay home. They don’t have family or friends they can rely on for child care. They have no other option but to put up a ton of money each month for child care. It makes an already difficult financial situation that much more challenging.”
With day care expenses per week for two children averaging about $598, Dan's dilemma is far from uncommon.
It's noteworthy that quite a small share of parents decide they can stay at home with the kids. According to Pew Research, just 18% of parents didn’t work for pay in 2021 (3). The good news is gender roles are slowly shifting — dads like Dan now represent 18% of stay-at-home parents, up from 11% in 1989.
How to make the right choice for your family
Nobody said this would be an easy decision, but making some key considerations will likely ease the process.
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You can look at the average weekly rates for child care (nanny, day care, family care center, babysitter) here.
Start by defining your family’s financial goals. Are you trying to pay down debt? Save for a home? Build a college fund? Your decision should align with these priorities.
For example, if you're breaking even with day care and gas expenses from a full-time job, but that job has upward mobility or long-term benefits (like a 401(k) match), it may still be worth it.
Also, consider your child care options and availability. In many areas, day care spots are hard to come by, especially for infants or toddlers. If grandparents or other relatives can provide support, that could tip the scales in favor of part-time or even full-time work.
Then, there’s the emotional load to factor in. Rejoining the workforce after years at home is a major adjustment, especially when combined with managing a household and child care.
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If the idea of rushing from day care pickups to dinner to emails sounds overwhelming, it might be smarter to start small and check your bandwidth before diving into a full-time role.
You can always try a "test-the-waters" strategy. Look for part-time jobs, contract work or even remote roles with flexible hours. This allows you to rebuild skills, close resume gaps and ease the transition, without fully committing to the demands of a 40-hour workweek and full-time day care.
Ultimately, the decision doesn’t have to be permanent. What works for your family today might change when your kids start school or if your financial situation shifts. The key is to weigh both the financial and emotional return of your work, not just the numbers on a paycheck.
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Part-time vs full-time work: What really pays off?
So, what actually pays off, part-time or full-time work? The answer is different for everyone, but here are some pros and cons of each route.
Part-time
- Pros: More flexible / family time, lower day care costs
- Cons: Less income, fewer career advancement opportunities
- Potential earnings: A $30 per hour part-time role (20 hours per week) earns about $2,400 gross monthly; after 15% taxes, about $2,040. Subtract part-time child care.
Full-time
- Pros: More income, more career advancement opportunities
- Cons: Less flexible / family time
- Potential earnings: A $40 per hour full-time job (about $6,400/month gross) nets $5,440 after 15% taxes. After day care for two children ($2,400/month), this nets about $3,040.
Working fewer hours means more family time and reduced child care costs. That said, part-time work offers limited income. Plus, part-time work may not hold steady employment benefits or career advancement.
On the other hand, full-time work brings higher earnings that potentially offset day care bills and contribute to long-term financial goals. However, with that comes longer hours, stress and inflexibility typical of many full-time jobs.
Article sources
We rely only on vetted sources and credible third-party reporting. For details, see our editorial ethics and guidelines.
LendingTree (1); Care.com (2); Pew Research (3)
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With a writing and editing career spanning over 13 years, Emma creates and refines content across a broad spectrum of industries, including personal finance, lifestyle, travel, health & wellness, real estate, beauty & fitness and B2B/SaaS/tech. Her versatility comes through contributions to high-profile clients like Moneywise, Healthline, Narcity and Bob Vila, producing content that informs and engages, along with helping book authors tell their stories.
